W ell I woke up in the morning
There's frogs inside my socks
Your mama she's a-hidin'
Inside the icebox
Y our daddy walks in wearin'
A Napoleon Bonaparte mask
Then you ask why I don't live here
Honey do you have to ask?
W ell I go to pet your monkey
I get a face full of claws
I ask who's in the fireplace
And you tell me Santa Claus
T he milkman comes in
He's wearing a derby hat
Then you ask why I don't live here
Honey how come you have to ask me that?
W ell I asked for something to eat
I'm hungry as a hog
So I get brown rice seaweed
And a dirty hot dog
I 've got a hole
Where my stomach disappeared
Then you ask why I don't live here
Honey I gotta think you're really weird.
Y our grandpa's cane
It turns into a sword
Your grandma prays to pictures
That are pasted on a board
E verything inside my pockets
Your uncle steals
Then you ask why I don't live here
Honey I can't believe that you're for real.
W ell there's fist fights in the kitchen
They're enough to make me cry
The mailman comes in
Even he's gotta take a side
E ven the butler
He's got something to prove
Then you ask why I don't live here
Honey how come you don't move?